8 Things to Absolutely Avoid in the First Month of Dating
Congratulations! You’re dating someone new, and things are going great. Butterflies, late-night texts, and endless optimism — what could go wrong? A lot, actually. Here’s a light-hearted list of things you should absolutely not do in the first month of dating if you want this relationship to go anywhere other than Awkward City.
1. Don’t Give Them a Cute Nickname Like “Snoogums” or “Lil’ Potato”
You’re excited; you want to show your affection in a unique way! But unless your goal is to watch their face twist into a look of mild horror, leave the “Snuggle Muffin” and “Honey Bunny” for at least a few months in. They didn’t sign up to be a brunch menu special — let’s just stick with their actual name for now.
2. Don’t Plan Your Wedding (Or, Uh… Mention It)
Yes, they’re amazing, and yes, you could totally see yourself walking down the aisle with them. Don’t say it out loud. While it may feel like a compliment to imagine your “future together,” there’s a fine line between “romantic” and “staring-them-down-at-dinner-while-whispering-Mr/Mrs. Smith.” Keep those mental vows to yourself. For now.
3. Avoid the Ex Talk — Or at Least Pretend They Don’t Exist
Talking about an ex too soon is like bringing a random relative to a party no one invited them to. Your date’s here to learn about you, not your last five heartbreaks. So keep the ex comparisons, stories, and emotional traumas locked up in a soundproof mental box. At least until month two, when they’re probably more prepared.
4. Do Not, Under Any Circumstances, Share Your Baby Photos (All 43 of Them)
Nothing says “red flag” quite like starting a slideshow of yourself as a 5-year-old in a sailor suit. Sure, your chubby baby cheeks are adorable, but they might just think, “What happened to this person’s friends?” No one wants to hear your entire life story before they even know your favorite pizza topping. One cute picture, max. Just one.
5. Don’t Send 20 Good Morning Texts — One Will Suffice
A “Good morning” text is sweet. Three is getting a little clingy. Twenty makes you the human equivalent of a broken alarm clock. Texting is great, but there’s no need to establish yourself as their morning routine. Let’s leave some space for “good night” texts — or they may never respond to either again.
6. Avoid the Temptation to Start an “Us” Instagram Account
Ah, the excitement of documenting your budding romance! Resist it. That means no “@Us_BeforeTheAltar” handle and no joint Instagram for “all of our adorable adventures.” It’s one thing to post the occasional couple pic. It’s another to build a digital scrapbook of your one-month-iversary while they’re still figuring out how they feel about brunch with you.
7. Steer Clear of Using Their Toothbrush (Or Leaving Yours “Just in Case”)
Your significant other may someday become comfortable with your quirks, but that day is not in week three when you casually ask to borrow their toothbrush. Hygiene boundaries still exist, even in romance. Want to stay the night? Perfect. Want to leave your toothbrush next to theirs? Chill. Next month, maybe you can move up to a drawer.
8. Refrain from Declaring: “We Don’t Need Personal Space!”
Ah, that first-month infatuation where you can’t get enough of each other. But declaring a need for zero personal space is the quickest way to make someone crave exactly that. Take a day off! Go to yoga class solo. Reconnect with your friends. This isn’t a Hollywood rom-com where everyone quits their lives to snuggle indefinitely. You’ll be glad to have some recharge time…and so will they.
Final Thought
The first month of dating is like dancing: fun, light, and filled with awkward, unexpected twists. So keep it relaxed, avoid any joint bank accounts, and save the pet names for your actual pets. Happy dating!
This fictional article was written by AI for entertainment purposes. Please support my work by buying me a coffee or two. Thank you.
